What's New Pussycat?
by J. Avery
Summary: In which Mordecai sees Benson's apartment for the first time and situational comedy-esque cockblocking occurs.


It was Friday, and Mordecai had had a sucky week, and he was in serious need for some downtime.

Him and Benson went to a movie (it was shit), then got some dinner at that French place (Benson wouldn't eat anything, due to his hatred of the French) and eventually the date ended with Mordecai walking Benson to his apartment door.

Or so Mordecai thought.

As he turned to leave, Benson entwined their fingers.

"Hey, um…"

"Yes?"

"Would you…?" Benson trailed off awkwardly, then gestured towards his apartment with his glass head.

Mordecai made a confused face. "… Check for burglars?"

Benson let out a breath, which made a bark/laugh noise. "No, idiot, I meant," Benson did the gesturing thing again, but that time more exaggerated.

"Oh. _Oh!_You mean…?"

"Would you… like to?"

In the two months they had been dating, Benson had reservations about… well, everything. "Don't let Pops see us 'embracing' Mordecai" and "My neighbors don't even know I date men, Mordecai" and "No I won't have sex with you in public, Mordecai". He was so goddamn prudish! And even though Benson got over the kissing in public and junk, Mordecai had yet to see Benson's apartment.

Until now.

"Yeah. Yeah sure," Mordecai nodded (hopefully not to enthusiastically).

Benson squeezed Mordecai's hand and led him inside, and Mordecai was first hit with the smell of… cinnamon?

"This place smells like the inside of the Keebler Elf tree," Mordecai laughed. He went to the sofa while Benson strolled off to his room.

"It's to… make the place smell nice. Since I'm almost never here," Benson explained. He added, with a smirk, "I'm too busy fixing shit my boyfriend screws up."

Mordecai laughed, "Your boyfriend sounds like a douche."

Mordecai took off his jacket and observed Benson's living space. It was nothing special. Coffee table here, television there, the most notable things were the various cat posters hanging about the walls.

Benson returned with no shoes, and a small grin. "He's not that bad."

He sat right next to Mordecai. Mordecai smiled at him, and waited for… something to happen, but Benson just sat next to him. Mordecai coughed and pointed at one of the cat posters.

"Fan of cats?"

"Oh, um…" Benson nervously laughed, "I got them after I shot some portraits for this woman in my building. Haha."

"Hmm," Mordecai nodded.

Benson asked, sounding curious, "Do you like cats?"

"Not really," Mordecai admitted. Benson frowned.

"O-okay, well… I'm… I'm not sure how to continue this conversation."

Benson smiled embarrassed, and Mordecai playfully rolled his eyes. "Don't worry. I'm tired of talking."

Benson confusedly stared until Mordecai grabbed his face and kissed him hungrily. Benson gasped, not appreciating the surprise, and pushed Mordecai off.

"Warn a person!" Benson snapped. He wiped his mouth with his sleeve and took a deep breath. "Okay."

Mordecai went back to attacking Benson's mouth with his tongue. Benson felt his eyes closing shut and his body pressing against Mordecai's, while his hands went up to the other man shoulders. But when Mordecai's hands started to wander, Benson broke the kiss again.

"What'syourfavoriteanimal?" Benson gasped.

"… What?"

"Just," he said between pants, "really… curious…"

Mordecai's mouth opened to respond, but he ultimately had no response other than, "I guess… I like giraffes? Is this one of those things that don't matter but turn out to be like, tests?"

Benson squinted his eyes, "What are you talking about?"

"What are _you_talking about?" Mordecai countered.

Benson rolled his eyes, as if to say never mind, and once again they were kissing and touching and Mordecai finally got Benson on his back. He made sure to kiss all over Benson's neck as he let his hands travel south, to Benson's zipper, and just when Mordecai was about to start unzipping, he heard a noise.

"What the hell was that?"

Benson looked up at Mordecai, terrified. "Might have been the door. I'll go to check." He tried to get up, but Mordecai pulled him back down.

"You're not going anywhere," Mordecai went back in, kissing Benson a bit more harshly and grinding his hips against the man beneath him.

Benson resisted the natural moan that formed at the back of his throat. Mordecai went for Benson's shirt this time, playing with the hem and until slowly pulling it over his head when he heard that goddamn noise again.

"Seriously. What is that?" Mordecai huffed, climbing off of Benson.

"It sounds like…" Benson began, then shut up.

"Sounds like what, Ben?"

Benson fixed his shirt and remained silent. Mordecai took that to mean he knew more about the noise that he was letting on.

The noise happened again, this time louder. Mordecai narrowed his eyes as he tried to focus on the sound.

If he thought about it… really thought about it… the sound was awfully familiar.

As it dawned on him, Mordecai smiled.

"Ben, do you have a cat?"

The gumball machine sucked in his lips, answering Mordecai's question. Mordecai laughed and got up from the sofa. "That's… that's _adorable_!"

He looked behind the sofa. No cat there. Mordecai looked in the kitchen area and saw a tiny silver bowl with a label that read "Oren".

"Where is she?" Mordecai sat back down, smiling at Benson like he beat him at something.

Benson sighed, "It's a he… and he won't come out. He doesn't like strangers."

Suddenly, a small cat hopped on the couch arm nearest to Benson.

It was black with white markings on its feet and face, and when Mordecai looked closer he could see a forest green collar around its neck.

"I'm a stranger?" Mordecai chuckled. He reached an arm towards Benson's cat, "He's a cute little guy."

The animal made an annoyed little noise and hopped into Benson's lap, away from Mordecai. Benson began to laugh, wholeheartedly, and he rustled his metal fingers through the cat's fine black hair.

"Oren," Benson said, a warm smile on his face.

Mordecai slowly retracted his arm. He guessed the cat had to get to know him a little better.

"Now we know your favorite animal," Mordecai said, staring at Oren.

"Yeah…" said Benson absentmindedly. He scratched at the top of Oren's head and the cat purred appreciatively.

The cat remained in Benson's lap until he shooed him off, and even then the cat just jumped onto the recliner only a foot away.

Benson turned back to Mordecai with a sunny smile. Mordecai smiled as well, but it was a bit… strained.

"Well," said Mordecai, pushing Benson backward once more, "if there won't be anymore interruptions…"

Benson almost went all the way down until something in him decided against it and put a hand on Mordecai's chest. "I… I just remembered… we have a really busy day at the park tomorrow."

Mordecai narrowed his eyes.

"You don't work tomorrow," Mordecai said.

"I-I meant… There w-w-was… Responsibility has no days off."

Mordecai stared at his boyfriend, mouth agape. "You're blowing me off."

Benson took Mordecai's hand, and looked into his eyes like Mordecai was the only other person in the world. "I had fun tonight."

The grip on Mordecai's hand tightened, and the next thing he knew, the blue jay was out in the hallway of Benson's apartment building.

"He's actually blowing me off," Mordecai said to himself, disbelievingly.

Benson opened his door and threw Mordecai's jacket onto his head.

"You forgot this. I'll call you!"


End file.
